Friday, November 25, 2022

The Necessity of Feeling


 
The Necessity of Feeling

What is the gift of ‘feeling’? What happens when we avoid feeling our feelings?

My heart hopes you find this article helpful on your journey of being aligned in Love, and inspires your discovery of how to embody joy daily.   

I have had great losses in life. My marriage ending was my first tragic loss for my heart, because of the toll it took on my family to regain our connection and love for one another. This was then followed by the deaths of a sister, Mom, Auntie, Uncle (who was my Godfather), and most recently my Dad. Grief has been my intimate companion for over a decade. The greatest lessons have been ‘Life is Now!’ and ‘grief is a journey of acceptance, trust, and a great teacher’. Please visit my article on grief. 

We need to feel our grief as it helps us to be present with the whole range of feelings that are possible. Suppression of feelings, in my opinion, perpetuates stuck energy within us. Suppression also leads to numbness, disconnection (from self and others), compartmentalizing, perpetuating pain, dis-ease, and a loss of integrity and trust with ourselves.

To be unwavering in love means we are taking on the deep work within ourselves. We are not projecting our pain onto others, we are dealing with it, by feeling our way through. Since childhood, we have been programmed to deflect our pain. To ‘Suck it up’, ‘behave’, ‘you are weak if you show emotion’ are popular opinions in society’s conditioning. On the contrary, it is not natural to deflect our feelings. It creates dis-ease within the body, mind, and spirit.

Consider the reactions of a small child. They fall down and respond according to the emotion of the adult that is present with them. If the adult overreacts with immense fear or concern, the child will generally feel their energy and react with a matching feeling of fear. Which can lead to crying or feeling a greater depth of pain from the fall. Worse yet is when we are met with anger, frustration, and projection that again shuts us down from showing any emotion at all.

Alternatively, if the adult is light hearted and responding to the child with a gentle smile and reassurance that they are okay, the child will generally pick themselves up with greater ease and brush off the incident. Can you see how this helps set them up for success to embody resilience for future falls? In life we all fall, over and over again. It is a part of life’s journey.

Having a perspective of seeing the world with childlike wonder and playful curiosity feels extraordinary. It allows us to be open to greater possibilities and experience for joyful presence. I believe these are all qualities that support us in connecting to unwavering love.

You might ask, ‘that is all well and good, what about when life hands us difficulties to face?’ Prior to opening myself to these possibilities, I would shy away, shrink back, and avoid confrontation at all costs. To make sure everyone else was ‘comfortable’. Never considering myself or the cost to my own well being. The ‘comfort zone’ can be a zone of contraction and staying in patterns and limitations that hold us back from allowing us a more authentic life.

I have witnessed the gift of seeing this reflection play out over and over, allowing me to understand my own patterns. How might you ‘lean into’ the feeling and circumstances in your life, to support you in working through your emotions quickly without getting stuck in the lower range of feelings?

Get out of your comfort zone and feel deeply and passionately. A good cry does wonders. An anger expression/process - in a controlled safe way - can support you in releasing what is ready to be complete. We hold back. Where does this show up in your life? 

Imagine again being that small child. Something is upsetting, it doesn’t feel good. It could be a reaction of immense sadness or anger, something that hurts your heart. It could be the feeling of being left alone, and feeling the pain of loneliness. It could be not being able to find your favorite toy or blanket, that helps you feel secure. It could be feeling helpless, as you wait for someone to provide for your basic needs like providing a bottle or changing a diaper. Imagine these instances for a small child.

What would you do as a small child? We feel the feels. We go into a full on temper tantrum. Screaming, pounding the floor. Give it a minute or two and there isn’t much intense energy left. It purges itself from our system. It is gone and often we cannot even recall what made us upset in the first place.

Then we grow up. We learn that ‘it isn’t okay to show our emotions’. We stuff it down, stuff it down, stuff it down, until our body reaches maximum overload. The stress in the body accumulates and creates dis-ease in the body. It doesn’t end well. If we cannot deal with the cause of the stress, it continues to build. It goes from a slight disturbance of alarm, where if we caught it would then be a Godsend. Though without being acknowledged, it turns into numbness. Ultimately, leading to greater destruction in the body.

That is the path that most are on. Are you wanting to choose a path of greater body awareness? Are you looking for support in transforming your perspective to align with greater love in your life? Are you looking to rediscover your passion and joy in life?

Working with transforming these patterns, limiting false beliefs, and welcoming the gift of reflection for what life is presenting you is powerful work. It takes courage, patience, and a great deal of love.

If I can support you on your journey, I welcome the invitation to connect. Feel free to email me at Jacqueline@vibrationalenergysolutions.com.




Becoming...Unwavering In Love


Becoming Unwavering in Love


How are you experiencing love in your relationships and in our world? 

How are you experiencing love within you?

 

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of the state of your mind.” –Wayne Dyer

 

Understanding the wounded patterns and stories the mind is telling you, is programmed from a young age. Have you done the work to reframe and rewrite these stories? If not, you aren’t alone. Neither has more than 95% of the population. 

We stay in the safe space of this conditioning - because it has kept us ‘feeling’ safe. It is the early programming that shapes the ego personality. It served to protect us when we were little to stay alive. Though now how old are you? 30’s, 40’s, 50’s (like me), 60’s 70’s? How did that 3, 4 or 5 year old little one within need to protect you, manipulating your environment to stay safe?

Did you need to be good, to not be seen, not be heard, not show emotions, not embarrass, to numb yourself, to distract yourself, to hate yourself in order to survive? This is all protection of a defender (the ego personality) who didn’t want you to get hurt or feel rejected when others projected their own shortcomings, self hatred, disappointment, abandonment - because they never took the interest, time or learned ‘how’ to heal it within.

Can you imagine the shifts that are possible when we begin to awaken on a massive scale? It is happening!

Having studied energy work for more than 20 years, I knew the day would come. It is exciting to see it all unfold. What seems scary for most, I can see it through another lens. One of hope, compassion, love, and understanding. We are witnessing awful traumatic outcomes currently. You might say, ‘how can you possibly say it’s exciting?’ 

It is only exciting because it is helping people to awaken. To awaken to their inner power, voice, truth, light, and love. To remember who they are. Remembering who you are is one of the most radically brave journeys the heart will take one on.

We weren’t meant to live a life of suffering, it is only a guide to awaken from the ‘dark night of the Soul’. To no longer choose to stay in the dark and use the momentum of your grief, heartbreak, helplessness, loneliness, and outrage to declare, ‘NO MORE!’ To remember your light, remember you are a vessel for/of God (Source, Universe, Spirit). A vehicle to make conscious choices and take critical action to awaken to the Divine design of your life.

How will you fill up your vessel when life is difficult or you feel empty inside? What would be actions that you can take that would create a declaration for yourself (your body, little one within, mind and Soul) that you are loved? Start by looking at what you enjoyed when you were young. Blow bubbles, play in the sand/dirt, create art, color a picture, go for a hike/walk, ride your bike, play in the water. These are playful starting points. Use your imagination and make your own choices to bring you back into the thriving state that gratitude welcomes us into.

Cleaning up your state of mind…and our world, begins within each one of us. Uncovering the old conditioning, beliefs, that are not aligned with peace, joy, and love. Then choosing a new path forward. 

To stop playing a part in another’s drama movie and pick up the pen and write your own screenplay. What would Heaven on earth feel like for you? What would you choose? How much time are you focused on activities that enliven you and your Spirit? How often are you focused on mind numbing activities that deaden your perception and lull you back into a slumber?

It is understandable as many people’s minds have been hijacked. Many have wobbled way off their true vortex…far, far away from their authentic self as they are ‘fighting’ the system. 

 

“Where attention goes, energy flows.” –Quote said by too many amazing humans to discern who first said it.

 

The mainstream media is constantly projecting fear and separation. Many are defending beliefs in whatever ‘side’ they were taught and conditioned to believe. There is massive control and manipulation rampant in society. It is a continuous looping cycle because many remain in fear and separation within their own mind. It will continue to be the broadcast, until enough people choose to turn the channel to a new station or turn it off altogether.

 

Mother Teresa wasn’t being lazy when she made the following declaration. “I was once asked why I don’t participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I’ll be there.” 

 

Can you imagine how it would have deterred her path of helping others had she been preoccupied with a focus on ‘war’. Can you see how her life giving energy would have been siphoned off? It is an energetic anomaly that where you give your energy (time and attention) - it will expand the focus of that which your focus is. Focusing on what you don’t want will only bring more of it.

A much better use of energy is to focus on what you do want. So it’s time to let go of the limiting beliefs that are keeping you hostage. Believing your lot in life is what you were dealt, is simply not true. Your Divine Destiny is what you choose…and by feeling love (God, Spirit, Universe) within, you have the exponential energy to co-create it.

If you remain distracted, addicted to whatever your vice is (youtube, facebook, eating, shopping, alcohol, drugs, etc) you will continue to be lulled into numbness. From this vantage point, life is depressing. From this self defeating space of thoughts and behavior –you won’t wake up. That is the goal of what I choose to call ‘the darkness’. 

Often it is only when life gets so uncomfortable and painful that life seems unbearable, do people choose another path and break free from the pain that enslaves them.

We can easily see the darkness in the world. What we often are pretending not to see, is the darkness that exists within each of us to varying degrees. I am far from perfect. There are many choices I’ve made that were HUGE lessons. I’ve gotten to stare - face to face with my darkness, as well as my ego that wants to fight to survive. I’ve learned to be humbled by it, to learn and grow. I’ve learned to drop the conclusions, judgments, and telling of dis-empowering stories. I’ve learned to create boundaries for my health, well being, and fostering of my light within.

Most people are ‘taught’ what to believe. From an early age we were ‘taught’ to conform. By our parents, by school, by the government. Those who don’t conform to societal conditioning are considered a threat. Variance outside of conditioning can lead to attempts to disqualify someone’s reputation. 

Other solutions, thoughts, and sometimes evidential documentation are kept out of the mainstream if it doesn’t fall into the narrative that ‘the controller’ wants. So it is excluded from the algorithm as a choice. You will be stuck inside the Matrix of what is being fed to you, as long as you belly up to the table.

It’s like an abusive relationship. Have you ever been in one? I hope not. Though if you have, you can begin to understand the conditioning. They lure you into conditioned helplessness, sometimes making you feel stupid, gaslight you to create self doubt, or create fear and/or manipulation through guilt or expectations. 

Unfortunately, many grow up with this type of abuse as well. It leads to a lifetime of questioning oneself, striving to be enough, or living in self hatred, shame, and self abuse. Once you experience or see it, it makes it blaring clear where else it exists, when you are ready and willing to see it.

 

“Could hell be a place where there is no self-respect? A place where people have no pride in their own existence or behavior, and thus would have none for anyone or anything else?” - Neil Peart

 

This can shift with one choice…to take responsibility. The ‘ability to respond’ is such a gift. To not be reacting to life. To respond and step outside the box you are in to see other perspectives, create new possibilities, and have access to solution level thoughts.

To stand unwavering in love for the little one within takes courage and using your voice. To no longer choose to chameleon into what others want that suits them, that offers you nothing in return. How much of this beautiful gift of life and breath have you given to others who have only chosen to take…until there is little left but dis-ease within you? When will you say, “NO MORE!” That is a valuable lesson and gift to learn.

What if this life we are living is a reflection of ‘Heaven’ or ‘Hell’ and the only thing that determined it was our choices and perceptions? How powerful would that be? What would you choose to shift to claim your freedom and break free from the gates of Hell?

 

“The energy of the mind is the essence of life.’ –Aristotle

 

Standing unwavering in love means that you are connected to your heart. You no longer choose to have the mind and the games it plays running the show. To have an extraordinary life requires you choosing to be extraordinary. Are you ready to choose you? In choosing you…you are choosing better not only for you, it is for those you love, and for the collective of the world we live in.

So what do you have to give up in order to create unwavering love? For starters, being a victim of life. Choosing the perspective that life is happening for you. Life isn’t against us, contrary to how it sometimes feels. Adopting the idea that life is happening for me, not against me, being patient for a new outcome, and witnessing how life can work for you is critical. 

We can start by looking within ourselves and dancing with source energy. It takes having a curious outlook with life. Asking a lot of questions can awaken this gift of wonderment to play in. I wonder…? How can this work out better than I can possibly imagine? 

Getting into the feeling as if the outcome you seek is already here, can also be a valuable resource. Not to play God and think you know the answer, though to leave enough space and openness to allow God to work with and through you. 

Trusting when life doesn’t seem to be working out for you and adopting curiosity ‘then there must be something/someone that is more in alignment with my heart’. For example, I cannot imagine staying in some of the relationships I have been in. When they ended, they created space for my soulmate to appear. 

If I maintain my trust to offer grace and understand my soulmate is also learning difficult lessons and is expanding his consciousness in order to meet me, I will be blessed with a soulmate who is ready for the next chapter of life, who is aligned in love. Where I get to be ‘me’...and ‘he’ is blessed and encouraged to be himself.

Until that day happens, I will joyfully feel into his energy, envisioning our togetherness, and trust if I continue staying focused on my work, passions, joy, love within - he will one day be standing in front of me.

Can you trust like this? That is standing unwavering in love. Trusting everything happens as it is meant to. 

Take a good look at your life and ask, ‘How is the reflection of what I am witnessing in the world and in my relationships showing up within me?’ It is there to teach you. What you are witnessing is offering clues for healing that you get to focus within. Where do you get to release control? Is it in your body? Family dynamic? Feeling broken, not enough, unlovable, too much, constricted, contracted, taken advantage of, conforming or not being true with your heart? 

There are many facets to this…and the best gift is to shine your light and ‘be you’...from a connected space in your heart.

Then we get to dance with transformational alchemy. This dance includes being honest at what your life has given you as feedback. It gets to be your guide to awaken in your Divine Destiny. Would you like to dance more with me?

My legacy is one of love...to help guide 1 million people home to their heart! Please consider sharing in this legacy by sharing this a friend or family member. You never know, you may be the angel who helps them awaken to their Divine Destiny!

In Gratude and In Love.